So it seems that bike magazines these days are lacking in the content department. I can say without a doubt that most are just glorified bike ads. Have you seen a bike review in Mountain Bike Action lately? Pretty much just cut and paste text talking about how fucking awesome and cutting edge the bike is, with big high def photos of said bike. They are usually in the unobtainium range for average joe as well, costing usually between $5000-$9000. Then they just regurgitate the same bull shit on each page for each product until the magazine you pay for at the news stand is dripping with manure.
My favourite part of these mags is when they showcase a product then try to play off the cost as if its a great deal. MBA had a little feature a while back on some wheels that "didn't break the bank" at a tune of $1500. What The Fuck. I didn't even pay $1500 for my bike let alone wheels, and this is a budget wheelset for you? What are you sniffing MBA? Glue? Maybe all that methane gas from the bullshit flying around your office has gotten to your heads.
Bicycle Times featured a polo jacket made for cycling around the city looking like a fucking hipster douche bag for over $400 and said it was a great value. Da Fuq? I tried to like this mag, even bought a few issues. Its just that the overall hipster fuckheaded-ness was too much, that and the fact that they think electric bikes are actual bicycles. Dumbasses.
Dirt Rag isn't bad but not every mountain biker swills back beer so could you piss off with the 'bikes and beer' attitude? Nothing pisses me off more than the "tip your mechanic with a beer" or "I'll bring the post-ride beers" kinda attitude. I don't drink, and I don't give a fuck if you do or not, but don't paint a picture that makes mountain bikers look like a bunch of tailgaters posing around their bikes.
Bicycle Magazine is out there for the discerning roadie, and with columns like "Style Man" it delivers. I mean, how could you not have a column dedicated to being a fashionable rider? If you aren't fast, at least you can look the part, right? Oh the vanity.
The best magazine I read was back in my early days of riding (late 90's) when Mountain Bike was still being published. It had Zapata Espinoza as editor and Dan Koeppel writing the column "Hug the Bunny". It was informative enough with decent reviews that actually pointed out the shortcomings of some bikes and had just enough of that "fuck you" attitude to be real. Most folk didn't like Zap but I enjoyed his column. We need more of this. Right now. We need reviews that can actually say "hey, -insert company name- , you've built some real junk over the years and some winners, and fuck you just because". I also want to see reviews of real world bikes. The kind that people in the 99% buy in the $400 - $2500 range. Someone needs to point out the obvious bull shit money grabs too and call these bastards out on their own bullshit. It would be great if a mag said "hey Sram, your new Boost hubs are a bunch of bullshit, fuck off with the new standards already", rather than the all to usual paid review saying how Sram is "revolutionizing" the bike industry by adding a couple of millimeters to front and rear hubs.
I'm starting to sound like a grumpy old retro-grouch so I'll quit my bitching. But hey, if you like reading these cookie cutter mags with photoshopped images then all the power to you. Just remember to put it down, forget the hype, and go for a nice ride on your already kick ass bike.
The Bric...._ mountain biker, road rider, heavyweight gear abuser. Built like a brick sh*thouse. No bike is safe.